Wednesday 2 April 2008

BORED OUTTA MY MIND

I'm bored outta my mind
i hate it when i get like this. All kinds of things start swimming in my head. unfair i tell you. unfair!

i'm faced with a decision.
to marry or not to marry?
do i luv him enough to go through with it?
is church really my exuse or is it just a pretext?
or do i want to luv another and dont want to acknowledge it.
he says he luvs me.
gosh gosh gosh.

truth is i feel smthing is holding me back. what it is i dont know.
we've been together for ...(counting fingers...)
yes! April will make it 6 months and i still feel strongly that i do not know him enough.
but he luvs me. isn't that want counts?
my eyes are still wondering.

my friends want me married off. guys who liked-luved me. is it to get the guilt of their chests or to make themselves feel better?
they should leave me jo/.

what'll it be? damn! i dont fcuking know for the life of me.

he says he luvs me. does not see me as his girlfriend but as his wife.
wooooww! major.

why cant i just bloody commit. what is this shit anyways.
(fingers going through hair)
now (hands going over face)
i feel frust.

husband scarce. true luv even scarcer.

i have always wanted to be with someone who i will be sooooo truely maddly deeply crazy about too.
i feel very cool. calm.
i need to focus on him.
hard dont know why.
me think me will go to the beach n do some major thinking. hope i dont sleep off sha o.

i need to make a choice. time is running out.

time is running out...
time is running out...
time is running out...
time is running out...
my fingers are just doing that. it's not my fault.

time to hit the BRT.
help!

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